Bechara Alzheimer !!

Another month another electricity bill, water bill,cable bill,paper bill,broadband bill,aah...one month so many bills.. I made note on a piece of paper along with the monthly grocery chit..After paying all the bills i went to a grocery shop for the final task,Did i miss something?? my girl thinks ki mujhe 'Black' movie mein Amitabh ko jo 'bhool ne ki' beemari lagi thi,woh lag gayi hein.'Alzheimer's desease'--thatz how they named it.Bechara Alzheimer,I don't think bachpan mein usne kabhi bhi socha hoga ki his name will be associated with a 'bhoolne ki beemari'--jaroor usne kisi interview mein 'what's ur father's name?' question ke time wall ki taraf dekh kar nakhoon chabaya hoga.And the interviewers would have declared,'aaj se bhool ne ki beemari ko log tere naam je janenge'.Toh my girl thinks that this desease has caught me too.And she has her reasons to think so.I don't forget the anniversaries or birthdays--come on yaar!aaj kal mobile phone ke jamane mein koi yeh sab bhoolta hein kya?--but I do struggle to figure out who Tuku dada is when she says,'tuku dada's bhabi came today.she was asking about you.'I immediately pray god to flash a photograph in front of my eyes where Tuku dada is happily holding his wife and both telling me 'hum tere hone wale yeh hein-woh hein'.But miracles happen very rarely, and more so with students who were 'less than average' in History.Very often,despite my greatest acting skills,I get caught and this results in a abrupt disconnection of the phone line.My tongue does release some special words of gratitude for Tuku dada and his wife,but koi fayda nahin....And not just in personal life,I think Alzheimer's ghost(assuming he is dead) is around me all the while.Very often I come out of shops without making payments,only to hear a 'Chiranjeevi**' look alike shouting from behind,'hei!hei...o sahab!mere paise'...as if I have just robbed him.Yes! it's quite embarrassing for many,but not 4 me--coz I am quite used to it.yes!I am used to such a stupid thing.And it happens the other way around as well.Matlab paise deke, sanyashi type--jisko sansar ke moh maya mein koi interest nahin-- I come out without bothering to pick the 'saman' I paid for.And again the 'south superstar' shouts,'Oh sahab! aap ka bag...sahab!'...as if I intentionally left a bag,containing 'RDX' in his shop....'RDX' se yaad aya...I need to buy 'good night'--'mosquito party' is having a ball out there in my house these days..err...nights...toh m leaving....



**Those who don't know 'Chiranjeevi'--lemme help u out--apne bollywood ka irfan khan hein na(haan!wohi crazy4-wala)....usko moustache laga do--ab uske mooh me cycle pump laga kar jitna ho sake hawa bhar do...the 'foola hua version of' irfan khan is 'Chiranjeevi'...ekdam same 2 same...

Not at all bakwas!!

A black day! Assam on 30/10 which paralyzed in shock all Assamese people across the globe. Bomb blasts have always been a ‘aam’ news for all Indians now a days but what happened this time, 18 high intensity blasts rocked which is first in Assam terrorism history moreover it is the attack on the spirit and hope of the people of the state. They were experiencing peace after a couple of decades. Now who is responsible for vanishing everyone’s hope? Yes we have the new band of boys in town trained in Bangladesh, in some of the districts of Assam Bangladeshis are in majority, amazing!! Thanks to the bloody politics, who use Bangladeshi illegal immigrants as their vote banks! Its time to wake up Mr. CM.


[Video language is in Assamese,you may not understand,Check the footage]

No bad habits!

Once a man was waiting for a taxi. A beggar came along and asked him for some money. The man ignored him. But being a professional, the beggar kept on pestering him. The man became irritated when he realized that the beggar would not leave him alone unless he parts with some money.
Suddenly an idea struck him. He told the beggar, "I do not have money, but if you tell me what you want to do with the money, I will certainly help you."
"I would have bought a cup of tea", replied the beggar.
The man said, "Sorry man. I can offer you a cigarette instead of tea". He then took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and offered one to the beggar.
The beggar told, "I don't smoke as it is injurious to health."
The man smiled and took a bottle of whisky from his pocket and told the beggar, "Here, take this bottle and enjoy the stuff. It is really good".
The beggar refused by saying, "Alcohol muddles the brain and damages the liver".
The man smiled again. He told the beggar, "I am going to the race course. Come with me and I will arrange for some tickets and we will place bets. If we win, you take the whole amount and leave me alone".
As before, the beggar politely refused the latest offer by saying, "Sorry sir, I can't come with you as betting on horses is a bad habit."
Suddenly the man felt relieved and asked the beggar to come to his home with him. Finally, the beggar's face lit up in anticipation of receiving at least something from the man. But he still had his doubts and asked the man,
"Why do you want me to go to your house with you".

The man replied, "My wife always wanted to see how a man with no bad habits looks like."

Keep rolling !!

How many people like long hair? I like! I chopped couple of times it very small, once when I saw Himesh Reshammiya on Karzzzz ( he may be does not know zzz’s are sleeping symbols) Anyways I could figured out why I've had so many jobs in my life, firstly having long hair every morning you have the golden three words “ Dhona , Sukhana and Banana” . Secondly khana banana , Thirdly washing cloths ( I have a full length post on khana banana and vital clues on washing cloths, check my “ I the Tom Hanks’ post but luckily have owned a washing machine now ). Next comes weekend plans as I stay alone and single. (Committed folks never have a chance for weekend plannings, he only follows. Experienced from my ex-loves) .Next comes office ! (My only roti, kapda and makan ka sadhan ). Then my boss, making him ullu for offs and leaves. He finds a happy soul in me as he was not. Am I happy?? It's because I smile a lot and say funny things and that really pisses people off. I tried to find why my boss is not happy ..yesh ( again I am adding one more job here) ..but I did! I went for a drink with him; I heard it’s an easier way to break out someone’s silence. After three pegs he broke. He lit a fag and said
“My parents did not understand me and I got married, now she is also not happy. I told them so many times I have no interest on girls. God created me like this what could I do?
When I became manager of your team, I felt for you. Guys with long hair make me crazy.
I had no words to tell him. “ Gay” my goodness.( Don't misunderstand me here , I am just shocked ) .I was in bad situation from that day I had to listen to him, I could not support him, he may think it other way and I can’t say its wrong or avoid him. I had quit my job(not really for that reason) and again added one more job! to find a job…and I chopped off my hair again . Because I had a nightmare with his words “Guys with long hair make me crazy”.But the best two words I know “Move on “

[Doped two joints, rolling d next one ....]

Life ki in side ko tu jaanle
Wrong mein hain right, yeh tu maanle
Speed breaker mein speed hai…… !!
Haar mein bhi kabhi jeet hai,
Paharomein laga huwa jo weed hai !!
So,Keep rolling !!