Sunday, August 10, 2008

Matrimonial.. matrimonial !!


After getting so many threatening calls from my mother that I should help her in searching for a bride for my brother. I finally registered a profile in a matrimonial site to help him out. This is Ultimate...... I bet u can't stop laughing. These are profiles taken from $#@@*!.com (Can't write the site name here). These are actual ads on a matrimony site. Grammar and spelling errors have no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the heart. My comments are in italic. Your comments will be appreciated.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after reading this post..
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Hello To Viewers My Name is Sowmya , I am single i dont have male,If any one whant to marrie to me u can visite to my home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalore .. if u like me u welcome to my heart... when ever u whant to meet pls visit my resident or send u letter..

Thanks
yours Regards Sowmya ~*~

(Truly yours)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i want very simple boy. from brahmin educated family from Orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework

What Homework???
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Becauese friendship is a first step of love.I am looking for my dreamboy who will love me more than i. Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on........hold my hand forever !!!

(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)

i am simple girl. I have lot of problem in my life because of my luck. now i am looking one boy he care me and love me lot lot lot

(I don't know why but this is one of my favorites)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i want a boy with no drinks if he wants he can wear jeans in house but while steping out of house he should give recpect to our cast

(by not wearing his jeans? What the hell...)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GIRL,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A BOY THEY ARE
1. THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.
2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION
3. THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.

(all of us are loughing {laughing})
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
whatever he may be but he should feel that he is going to be someone groom and he must think of the future life if he is toolike this he would be called the man of the lamp

(Bhagwaan !! I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this girl wants)
Infact she doesn't know wat she wants ?.. ? A LAMP ? ?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and I love the patner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok

(I am again clueless but I liked the use of 'ok'. The person is Suffering from 'Ok-syndrome')
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
iam pranati my family histoy my two brother two sister and father & Mother. sister completely married

(somebody please explain how to get married completely'?)
( Confused ????? )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
my name is farhanbegum and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes

Height of desperation!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
iam kanandevi. i do own businas.one sistar.he was marred.

(No comments)
(Plz for gods sake ask somebody's help in framing sentence )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
hello i am a good charactarised woman. i want to run my life happily.i divorced my first husband. his charactor is not good'. i expect the good minded and clean habits boy who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted ....

(but credit cards not accepted..???)
(Perhaps Debit Cards accepted ?.. Clean Habit's??????? Is there
anything like that.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am Sharmila my colour is black, but my heart is white. i like social service.

Zebra..???)
(Gosh!!!!!!!! she knows her heart color

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hi, I am Sitalakshmi MBA , he should be superstar , loving, caring and daring.He should have big mustache, A person from south Indian orthodox family will be romba romba shwagatham..

Duhh…Veerappan is no more ! and MBA is your initials or degree??

I finally close the window and log on to orkut. aah !! sorry momma can't help you !

21 comments:

Varun said...

Good lord! that's horrendous english!
why don't these girls use like the guy from old days sittin outside railway stations writing out postcards for ppl?

Arjun said...

haha... Thank God..!!

Anyway, it was funny to read... ;)

Cheers..!!
Arjun

Dan* said...

wow what a prfile :D :D

very nice :)

the girl in the pic is that really here ???

hasHAN hazaRIKA said...

Thanks guys...
@Dan
Nope..she is not there :)

Shilpa said...

good one

Nabila Zehra Zaidi said...

OK...I got english no proper left me with grammar...

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

DISASTROUS!!!

This was one piece which deserves the official disclaimer 'READ AT YOUR OWN RISK' >>pheeeww<< I agree its fun... but some 10 and I was pulling my hair already...Gosh...

This one time... for fun's sake we were checking out profiles at some similar site and I still rmember this one... "I am an 18year old. Looking for a girl to satisfy my needs." That is ALL that his profile said...!Decipher on your own ;)

Shantharam Shenoy K said...

REALLY FUNNY THIS....TOO GOOD...I HAD RECIEVED THIS AS AN E-MAIL LONG BACK AND PUT IT IN MY BLOG TOO..BUT ITS SOOOO FUNNY DAT..AM STILL LOGHING....HA HA HA...

Anonymous said...

lol...!!!

this is really funny.. nice work buddy.. lol...

BK said...

hehe.. really funny one.. wud love to visit the site myself :)

tejuvinay said...

lolz !
real funny !
....(gap of 5 mins irrestible laughter)

keep writing

Teju :)

Shiva said...

ur xperiences rock
and so does ur blog...

sudma..hadev ;)

Shiva
CrAzYbLoG ,
v.CoL

Anonymous said...

hi .. very good.. post is nice ok completely funny.. ok... i like.. very very...... write like this.. please please please......

Anonymous said...

hm.. [:D] jokes apart.. nice post.. [:D] haha.. im still laughing[:D]

Srikanth said...

i read this post earlier in my yahoo inbox months ago

anyway its really funny....LOL

nice nice!

Aanshik said...

OMG!!!!!
The guys who will marry such women sure will be unlucky :(

Anonymous said...

haahaa.. ROFL!!

dis is abt english.. i knw a frend who tries to speak hindi in da same manner..hehe :P poor guy hope he learns the lang soon :D

bt this is one hell of a laugh!! or LOUGH! :P hehe

Girish Mahadevan said...

I am loving it..nice post & great cut outs...;-)..BTW i had a similar case study on matrimonial sites, it might interest u...

http://girishmahadevan.blogspot.com/2007/12/research-on-matrimonial-sites.html

buh bye blogger, hope ur bro's profile scores soon..;-)

nameera said...

well...planning to create an account on shaadi.com!
hilarious!

Pramathesh said...

Well, my friend once gave me a similar list. I forgot all but don't know why I still remember this one:

I am a simple graduate girl. I want a good looking, good natured Assamese Brahmin MBA boy who love me all day all night. Who love my Ma-Papa. Who understand me and ma needs.

(In short, she wants a Perfect boy who is a fool even after that!)

Dialect Of Heart said...

hahi hahi pet futi, intestine fan'ot ulomi ase goi! Seriously, What's wrong with these people!

Aparna (Life Takes) said...

jeez! what kinda peculiar characters do u stumble in matrimonial sites!!??


i think i forgot english

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